At times when I am desperately bored I read the UK’s comedy newspaper, the Daily Mail, looking for some badly written news article … and just today I find one entitled Pagan mother’s fury after son brings home Bible from school but witchcraft books are banned. It tells of a Pagan woman who was outraged when her son brought home – of his own accord, mind! – a Bible from school, which was one of a consignment donated by the Gideon Society. So incenced was she that such scurrilous literature was available at the school, she tried to bring in a load of spell-books to distribute to the pupils… but was declined.
This story is remarkable for a number of reasons. For a start, this is the first time I have heard of a Pagan giving her books away for free, given that Llewellyn usually charges top-dollar for all kinds of rubbish 
. Secondly and more to the point, though, American schools apparently have an all or nothing approach to religion based upon an interpretation of the First Amendment. This is alleged to be part of a successful “grand experiment” to avoid religious trouble which has happened in e.g. Germany and Ireland. This of course plainly ignores the fact that such trouble has not happened in the UK, which operates a Church-of-England-by-default-but-you-can-opt-out-of-it-if-you-want type of system. Maybe this system works in the UK because the Church of England doesn’t count as a proper religion!
Anyhoo, in the all-or-nothing debate, I am backing the “All” option – for the simple reason that if it goes through, I intend to found my own religion! That way people will be forced to read my books! (Actually I don’t mind if they don’t read them as long as they pay for them ).
Incidentally, I note from another article on the same news story, that the day the School Board is meeting to decide whether to allow Pagan Books in schools is February 2nd. Oh the irony!
Pagan Weddings could be legalised: Daily Mail could be upset
This marriage would be illegal or at least frowned upon in the Star Wars universe, but could soon be legalised in the UK if the Daily Mail’s worst fears are realised.
In the most blatant piece of yellow journalism I have witnessed since… well… the last time I read the same newspaper, the Daily Mail has announced that due to what it perceives as a flaw in the new Equal Marriages bill, Pagan Weddings could be legalised in England and Wales. NB: in the mentality of the Daily Mail, this is supposedly a Bad Thing.
At the moment, if you want to have a Pagan wedding in England or Wales, you are obliged to come to an arrangement which is common on the continent of Europe, i.e. have two wedding ceremonies – the first being the kind that you would ideally want as a ceremony, but with a second which consists of a quick ten-minute jobbie down the Registrar’s office on Monday morning to actually make it legal. Now it so happens that Christian churches almost always have their own registrar to attend their marriages which is why a Christian couple only needs the one ceremony. Thus: if a Pagan religion were allowed to have the same arrangement, this would spare Pagan couples the extra expense and bureaucracy as well.
Needless to say, however, the true situation is far more complicated.
The unfortunate fact of the matter is that the amendment to the Equal Marriages bill which is the source of the controversy applies only to Humanists – not to other named groups. The Daily Mail therefore has conveniently pulled some “anonymous government sources” out of its arse to supposedly say that “ridiculous” (sic) sects like pagans and even Jedis could mount a legal challenge to the Act on the basis of some sort of human rights discrimination type bullshit and force the recognition of their own ceremonies as well.
“But what,” I hallucinate that I hear my many millions of pagan (and even Jedi) readers say, “would be wrong with that?”
As far as the Daily Mail is concerned, everything. As far as people whose opinions count, however, there is a more subtle objection. In an ideal world, members of any religion ought not to have to resort to litigation – which may prove costly, time-consuming and stressful – to vindicate their basic rights. Therefore the best solution is not to have to resort to a dodgy legal challenge, but to actually have the right to marriage written in the black and white of the statute.
So come on, Members of Parliament! And Peers as well! The bill is currently before Parliament and you have the power to propose a suitably worded amendment which would allow such groups to conduct proper ceremonies. Search your feelings – you know it to be true.
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Tagged as Daily Mail, Equal Marriage Bill, House of Commons, House of Lords, Jedi, Marriage, pagan, Tamara Cohen, Wedding